I Found More Than One

I don’t have to tell you about all that’s happening around us and within our midst. You see it everyday with the constant news cycles, social media’s chaos, confusion and conflict.  And if you haven’t been living under a rock, you know someone who has been impacted by COVID-19, job loss, racial and gender inequality, financial struggles and more. We are definitely in a crisis.

 

So how do we live in a world filled with such panic and fear? I know I have felt it. I feel it each time I have to leave my house with my Pandemic Kit (mask, gloves, sanitizer, disinfectant wipes).
As I look at everyone walking around with a mask on and trying not to make eye or physical contact with me, I feel such a sadness come over me. Because as humans, we are made for connection, touch and belonging. I sometimes sense feelings of loneliness trying to creep in because I’m so isolated from the world.
Nothing is the same anymore and neither are we. We can’t be. This has certainly changed us all in some way. It has also revealed who we are and who we can become as result of this crisis.
I take hope in recognizing that crisis always proceeds transformation. I also take hope in knowing that better days are upon us.And I know that there’s always a rainbow…not just after the storm, but even in the midst of one.
Recently,  I sat down to look for the rainbows in my life during these arising times.  What I found was simply amazing because I discovered several rainbows that I want to share with you.

 

Here’s what I discovered:

Rainbow 1: Releasing Excess. I don’t need as much material things that I thought I did. As I started clearing and cleaning out closets, cabinets, attics and more, I realized that I had too much excess. I was holding onto things that I needed to let go of and would never use again. Who needs 15 pair of black pants or dishes that you haven’t used in 25 years? As I began getting rid of “stuff” I felt a sense of freedom and release.

Rainbow 2: Cherishing the Moments. I love hearing my children and grandchildren voices. Because of COVID-19, our children have limited their visits to our home. They say it’s because we are in the elderly population. LOL. Therefore, we don’t get to see them or our grandchildren like we are accustomed to. But they all make every effort to make sure we get to visit with the grands via phone and Face-time. I find myself being more tuned into these visits. Because for me, every moment, every second has become even precious. Sometimes our FaceTime visits can last for two hours. I know that when I can get to hug and kiss them again, I will never take these moments for granted again.

Rainbow 3: Reconnecting w/ Old Friends. I have had a chance to catch up with old friends. Because things have slowed down, we have more time on our hands. We were all moving at lightening speed and had little time for important things. Lately, I have reconnected with friends I have not talked with in years. It’s been so refreshing to talk with them and reconnect. I have even reconnected with some elementary school friends. Just the other day an old friend and I talked for 4 hours! We laughed and had a blast!

Rainbow 4: A Deepened Spiritual Life. I have always made my spiritual walk and life a priority. But during these past few months, I’ve made an even new effort to practice the power of “Surrender.” Surrendering to God has been my biggest priority and allowing God’s desire for my life to be mine. Aligning with the spiritual and universal principles that governs our lives is my daily intention. I don’t always get it right, but my heart is turned towards God’s highest desire and intentions for my life. I’ve  released some things that thought I wanted only to tap into God’s ordained destiny for me. I can’t tell you how freeing it is to know that I can’t change things, but as I surrender to God…I can change. I love my sacred times of prayer, meditation, worship, and listening. I’m more committed to this holy journey to unfold my soul’s destiny than ever before. In other words…to live an Awakened Life. My life reimagined and success redefined.

 

Rainbow 5: My Health is My Greatest Resource.
How often to we neglect our health going after money thinking it’s our most needed resource? I’ve learned that my health is my greatest resource and this it’s up to me to take care of it. I’m beginning to look at what I put in my mouth more intentionally because I have taken more time to cook better meals. I order my groceries and have them delivered therefore I can only eat what I have in the house…LOL. I’m starting to move my body more…walking, Tai Chi and Yoga have been my choices. I am not where I want to be right now, but I am on my way and lost 11 pounds. I check my vital signs daily and they are looking really good.  I have also added some amazing supplements needed as I get older.
These are just a few of the rainbows that I have discovered as I navigate this new normal. There are so many more and if you’d like, I will share more in the coming weeks.

 

Also, I would love to hear some of your rainbow lessons. So please feel free to share them with us in the comment box below.
Until next time…stay safe and don’t forget to look for your rainbows.

 

Losing Mom: Lessons I’ve Learned

Losing my mom back in August was one of the worst days of my life. It shook my very foundation and the pain was and still is horrific. So horrible until it landed me in the hospital for 3 days, two weeks ago,  because I allowed it to manifest in my body by not giving it it’s proper release. I refused to grieve. I was not willing to accept the unacceptable truth of losing my closest friend, my sister friend, my safe space, my warmth, my love…my mommy.

 

As I sat in the hospital and looked around into the faces of my beloved dear husband, my brother, my father, my son…the men who love me the most…I saw in their eyes fear, despair and defeat because they couldn’t fix it for me…men like to fix things. The love that I felt radiating from those men as they all surrounded my bed, literally lifted my spirit and my actual body. It was in that moment I was reminded how much I’m loved, cared for, cherished and needed. My oldest brother called me from Georgia and I could feel his fear and love through the phone. Mom taught all of us how to love and care for one another. It was in that moment that I remembered that love. A lot can happen in 3 days. Jesus rose from the dead in 3 days and I rose from that bed in 3 days with a renewed mindset and strength.

 

My mother accompanied me on my last 4 speaking engagements before she passed. I remember her saying to me as we left one of the gigs…she said, “You had those folks mesmerized. You could hear a pin drop in the place. All eyes were on you because you had something real to say to them. Don’t stop doing what you do, because people need you. What you are saying to the people is needed and they are hungry for it. I am so proud of you. And you looked so pretty.” I remembered what she said, “They need you.”

 

We’re only here in this world for a brief moment and we are here for a purpose. When we lose sight of that purpose, we forget who we are. Where purpose is unknown, abuse is inevitable. Two days before landing in the hospital, my daughter said to me, “Mom, I know you miss grandma and so do I. But you’re my mother and I don’t want to lose you.”

 

It frightened my children that I was in the hospital. I’ve never been in the hospital but only to have babies and some brief out patient procedures. I had to figure out how I landed there. I did. It was because I had forgotten who I was and why I am who I am. The great thing is that we can at many moment remember. Love allowed me to remember. I keep telling you guys that LOVE is the most powerful force in the universe.

 

I still miss mama so badly. But I also remember that my mother lived life full out. She left nothing undone. Everything that she ever wanted, she brought it. Everything that she wanted to do, she did it. She was fun, loving and straight to the point. She lived her dreams, she loved her family and friends, she fulfilled her purpose in life and left a rich legacy for all to remember and live through. Everything that she promised, she honored.

 

My mother loved me so completely. I never had to second guess that love. What we shared as mother-daughter was something so sacred and so precious that I can’t give it language. People saw it when they saw us together. I’m my mother’s daughter…yes. And I will always be. Yet, I must never forget that I am God’s daughter first.

I’ve learned that I’m stronger than I thought. I know that God has prepared me and kept me for this very moment. That even in one of my greatest loss, there’s victory in God. My soul’s desire is to be of service to God and His purpose for my life. To simply live out my highest level of love, authenticity, creativity, productivity and success.
I also learned that in my deepest sorrow, there’s always a rainbow staring me in the face waiting to be noticed. My rainbow is the announcing of a new grand baby on the way. Yesterday, my daughter and son-in-love announced that they are pregnant. What an amazing gift!

 

I shall forever love my mother and be her daughter. Yet, I’m also a mother, a grandmother, a sister, a friend, a wife and I am so blessed to have a husband who loves me,  family, friends and supporting cast who don’t mind demonstrating what love looks like to me. I’m so very blessed to know a God who never leaves me or forsakes me.
Today, I’m well. For that I am grateful. This is a lesson that I learned from my mom. Now, if you excuse me…I’ve got some life to live.

The Forgotten Woman

Mixed Race woman with curly hair

I’ve been an entrepreneur for 33 years now and I can tell you that I would have it no other way. I love building dreams and birthing visions. I also love helping women do the same and this is exactly what get to do every day. Yet recently, I’ve been noticing a common issue among women. They seem to be sadden. Don’t get me wrong, many are excited about how their dreams are being fulfilled. I see lots of women’s groups on social media chanting their theme of “Boss Lady.” I see them posting all of the great things that are happening and the success they are experiencing in their companies. I love watching women celebrate their wins. I celebrate with them.

Yet, what I don’t see is a lot of women sharing their happiness outside of their businesses, careers and their kids. We are notorious for bragging about our kids, our career successes and even our weight losses. I love seeing this happen. But the one area that you see very little from successful women is their love life. Now, I recognize that some women tend to feel that part of their lives need not be shared. I get it. But when I talk to women and the issue arises, I have encountered the some common pains. That is…many successful women are not truly happy in their love life. I didn’t say all of them…but if they were truthful, a lot of them feel that something is missing in their love life.

How can we become so successful in other areas of our lives and yet, when it comes to creating intimate, harmonious, healthy, mutually satisfying relationships, we are failing big time?

The answer? We have somehow forgotten that part of ourselves. We have disowned that part of who we are, because we remember the pain she’s experienced every time she opens her heart. So we hide and shield her. How do we hide her? We hide through our success, our work and taking care of everyone else. And somehow, we think this is enough for us.

The truth is, it isn’t. Women thrive when they live from their hearts. Love is a natural state for us. And when we are in love and being loved in returned the correct way, we blossom. Remember, when people use to tell you that you were glowing? They could tell that you had fallen in love. Yet, that love turned on you. That love hurt you and because of this, you’ve not allowed yourself to love deeply any longer. You’d rather play it safe and not risk being hurt again by anyone…including your husband.

So you busy yourself being his wife…his partner…but surely not his woman. Whether you are married, divorced, single, widowed or in a “It’s complicated” relationship…you deserve to be loved and cherished as a woman. It’s fuel to our soul. We’re built for love. Yet, we haven’t learned how to master this area of our lives. So we become driven by success because at least we can feel some sort of self worth and value from what we do. Because we are not really sure that we can be loved for WHO we are.

But isn’t it time for us to reclaim that part of ourselves that we’ve some how left on the table? It’s time to take back that disowned part of ourselves that we’ve not told to truth to. It’s time to heal that part of us that we’ve tried to shield from more pain. You’ve heard me say that this is the year to be Remarkable. I truly believe that when women are happy, loved and successful that we can and we will be apart of the radical change in the world. We women are fearless when we are living love in all areas of our lives..including intimate relationships.

Are you finally ready to recapture that part of yourself that wants and desires love? You can have it. Not only is it possible, it’s inevitable. I want to invite you to join my Insider’s Circle where I will be teaching women leaders and entrepreneurs on the keys to life mastery. Not only will we learn the strategies to make life work in areas of business, success and health…we will do some deep dives into relationship building…making love work. This program is about speaking to the soul of a woman. That includes your love life.

For only $37 a month, you will begin to see your life transform in ways you’ve never imagined.  Take a look and join today. Our monthly call is tonight and we would love for you to be apart of this wonderful group of women. This is not just any woman’s group…this is a experience that speaks to the primal part of your soul as a woman.  Join now: www.globalawakenedwoman.com 

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No Love on Valentine’s Day!

happy-valentines-dayI remember when I was going through my divorce, my ex-husband told me that I would never find anyone who would want to marry me with 3 kids. Even though he got married 2 months after our divorce was final, he assumed that I would have a difficult time. What he didn’t know was I was so relieved to be done with him that another husband was the last thing on my mind. As the years passed by, I did date a little, but I was busy focusing on my children and their well-being. I met some amazing men and had a blast dating…Lord did I have some fun! Oops…okay Angela, stay focused. There were some who wanted to marry. But, it simply was not time. I remember, my mentor saying to me, “honey, it’s not time…you will know.” I do remember, Valentine’s Day being especially difficult. There were always roses sent to my office and often times a few dozens from admirers. Yet, there was no one who was special in my life.

I remember feeling a sense of sadness, even loneliness. These are two emotions that a lot of women find difficult to admit. I’ve never felt such loneliness before…it literally gripped something on the inside of me. I remember saying to a girlfriend of mine, ‘I’m not leaving my house tonight (Valentine’s Day) because if I see another couple all hugged up in love, I’m going to break down and cry. We both laughed. I stayed home and called some of my single friends, men and women, and we all got together, ordered some food and laughed our lonely hearts away. As I began to mature and started my journey of discovering my truth, those feelings of sadness and loneliness began to drift away. I am not saying that I no longer had bouts of these feelings…they simply didn’t control my life. I had found some joy and happiness because I was awakening to my truth. My truth of who I was and what was possible for my life. Vision and purpose can create a sense of joy and hope deep within that cannot be explained. I had found my sweet spot…the intersection between who I was and what I was here to do. I also tapped into my G-Spot. Get your mind out of the gutter. I’m talking about my “Greatness, My Gifts and My Genius.” This journey was so beautiful. It was my journey to being. God was teaching me about His love. I had learned to love all of those disowned parts of myself that I had left on the table. I was evolving.

So when my friend Peggy asked to introduce Bill to me, I said no. I simply was living my life like it was golden and there was no room for a man. You see I had began hiding behind my church activities and doing what the mothers of the church told me…wait on God. Until one day, my mother with all of her wisdom and wit said to me, “You deserve to be happy and you deserve to be loved and cherished. Those children are getting older and you only have a few more young years….before age sits in.” My mom doesn’t mix words. So after 8 months of Peggy asking to introduce me to Bill, she slipped him my business card. He called and the rest is history. We met in February and was married in December of the same year. We’ve now been a blended family for 14 years. He is my soul mate and the love of my life. I’ve enjoyed this journey with my guy.

So here’s my point to those of you who feel as if no one understands. Trust me, I do. I know how it feels to not fit in at church, at events when you are the only one without someone on your arms. I know how it feels to be tired of engaging with the kids and family, when you simply want some adult time. Someone to gaze into your eyes and tell you stuff, even if it’s not true. You simply want to feel special for one day…or night. I get it. I also know how it feels when your friends turn their backs on you because they fear you being around their man. They don’t include you any more. I get it. I know how it feels to listen to the music and cry until you have no more tears wondering if anyone could love you the way you need to be loved. I feel you my dear sisters. I know how it feels to not look forward to the holidays…they can be the hardest. Because I’ve always worked for myself, I at least didn’t have to see everyone getting flowers delivered to their desks. I sometimes believe some sent them to themselves…LOL. Let me stop.

So here’s what I want you to know. Delay doesn’t mean denial. If you want a loving, lasting, mutually satisfying and harmonious relationship, it’s possible and it’s possible for YOU. You are love, loved and lovable. God made you this way and it does not matter what anyone says…this truth can’t be changed. I want you to take yourself to dinner, light your own candles and buy your own flowers/candy. Love yourself in the deepest parts of your being. So if you don’t have a Valentine’s this year…it’s okay…be your own. Because better days are ahead for you. This I do know. I also want you to know that I’m thinking of you.

You are not forgotten. Just because I have a husband, this doesn’t make me any more lovable than you. Just because I’m in love, doesn’t mean I’m not thinking of you and wanting the same for you. I so want it for you. Love makes a woman blossom. It just does. Here’s what I want to say to those of you who have someone in your life…reach out to your friends who don’t. If you have a friend who is single and you know she’s going through. Send her a card or some flowers on Valentine’s Day. Let her know that someone loves her and is thinking of her. I don’t know who this is for, but it’s for someone. I love you…but God loves you more. And God is concerned about the things you are concerned about.

Don’t let anyone tell you that you are wrong for feeling sad. Feel the feelings, move through them…don’t hold them inside…release them… and then plan a time with some friends to laugh the time away. Then get on Facebook and watch people post these Fake stories…then holler! Because they are out here. Let me go before I go left…I can be a little shady at times…pray for a sister. Seriously, people are going to flood their wall with their Valentine’s gifts and etc. I promise not to do this. I will close with this…I want you know that not only is true love possible for you…it’s inevitable. Remember, love never fails and God loves you best. I love you Awakened Beauties!

Please leave a comment below and don’t forget to share this on your Facebook Page.

Becoming Irresistible on Valentine’s Day!

AEB89D15E4CB4499AD50194C6255296E.ashxI remember when I was a divorced, young mother of three children on Valentine’s Day. It was a horrible time, as I would witness all of my friends receiving flowers at work and getting ready for an evening of dinner and love. Some of my single friends and I would joke and tease each other about not wanting to leave the house on that evening.

It wasn’t so much that I wanted someone to send me flowers or take me out to dinner, it was that no one seemed to WANT to. My pain originated from a deep place of not feeling lovable. I thought perhaps I wasn’t thin enough, pretty enough, sexy enough or even good enough. I remember my loneliness feeling like a deep ache in my body. I would actually roll from side to side in my bed and moan from that relentless agony of loneliness.

It wasn’t until I was ready to stop playing the victim and feeling sorry for myself, that my life took a turn. The next year, I found myself  lonely,  once again. But this time, I choose not to be alone. Some of my single friends and I, men included, decided to watch movies and eat pizza at my house. We had the best time. We joked about not having dates, but saving money on gifts we didn’t have to buy. We also cried about lost love and how to get stronger by supporting each other. It was a great time. Not the alternative I desired, but at least I wasn’t alone.  Still lonely, but not alone. At least that’s what I told myself.

Often times, life will show up to teach us many lessons. As I began to embrace my singleness, I also began to understand the difference between being alone and lonely. Being alone was a temporary state of being that I chose, to reflect, renew and revive myself and my life. Being lonely was a state of being that I allowed to choose me, and create suffering and struggle.

As I embraced my time alone time, it became a beautiful space of  learning and recognizing my many incredibly lovable traits. This is where I began to develop my “Love Rekindled” Program, that I teach men and women from around the world. As I began to actualize the principles in this result based program, I started to awakened within me, the true authentic woman. And I began to fall in love with who I was become…or shall I say who was emerging within me.

As I began to actualize this process of rekindling the love within me, the magic happened. I became irresistible. True self love will radiate from you like a magnet and it will attract back to you the same thing in your life.

By the time Valentine’s Day came around the next year, I received three different dozens of flowers delivered to my home and office. I received beautiful gifts, dinner, dancing and a lot of laughter. I actually had 3 different dates on the same Valentine’s Day. Lunch with the first one, dinner with the second one, and dancing with the last one. And yes, they all knew about each other. I wasn’t actually in a relationship with anyone. These were simply amazing men, I had met, who were trying to get my attention. As Steve Harvey says, “let them work for you.” You are worth the effort.

I did not go after these results. My only goal was to release the painful experience of loneliness. My goal wasn’t to have a date for Valentine’s Day. I simply wanted to be free from the feeling of not being lovable. It was about an internal shift, of how I viewed and loved myself.

I actually married one of those incredible me, that same year. He’s my love and I am his. Together, we have a wonderful life.

If you are alone this Valentine’s Day or if your relationships is not what you truly would like it to be, I want to encourage you to do something different. Begin by choosing YOU. Because, not only is love possible for you, it’s inevitable. Your love story must begin with YOU!

What will you do different this year? Please leave your comment below: