What Is Wrong With Us?

American-Flag-1024x640The recent backlash at Steve Harvey and others who decided to meet with President Elect Donald Trump has deeply disturbed me. Why? Because as I read some of the comments, I witnessed such anger and rage in the hearts of our people. And now there’s an outrage at the artist who are performing. Do we really want to tell artist that they can’t perform at the inauguration? Really? Last I checked, we live in a free world where we can choose to sing where we want and sit and talk to who we want.  These folks are grown.  First let me say that I am not a fan of Mr. Trump. I make no bones about it. I will NEVER agree with a man who did his best to discredit our first African American President with the birther movement and NEVER issued a proper apology. I don’t know if many of you understand all the underlying pain that went along with that horrific act. I have not forgotten his awful statements of grabbing women by the p^$#y, or the fight he picked with a Gold Star family or how he mocked a disable man and tried to say he didn’t.

Now, the difference in me stating my disdain for Mr. Trump’s behavior and others viciously attacking those celebrities is that they are not our President. Mr. Trump must and should be held accountable for what he does because much of his actions will costs us greatly.  I was truly sadden when he won. Because I don’t believe he’s has the character needed to be a leader of the Free World. In many ways, I believe those close to him also know this, but they are willing to use him and ride his coat tail  for their own ego and desire for power, while we watch him mentally meltdown infront of the world. If you don’t think he’s having a meltdown…go back and watch his rallies, read his tweets and etc. I am embarrassed for him.  I simply don’t agree with who he has presented himself to be to the world.  Mr. Trump’s rhetoric, racist, sexist out burst have created more divide in this country. I am more convinced based on his recent cabinet choices that he does not have the best interest of people who look like me at hand. I listen to what you do, not what you say.

Yet, as President, he does get to make these decisions. That being said, I am also truly bothered and disturbed with how people are attacking citizens for the choices and decisions they make. Steve Harvey, Kayne West, Jim Brown, or Martin Luther King’s son does not owe any of us an explanation for why they do something. They do NOT hold public offices where they have to represent anyone other than themselves. They are not running for President where we can required certain things of them. They are only YOUR role models if YOU choose them to be. These folks are grown and don’t need your permission to make decisions for their lives. Would you want someone telling you whether you can meet with someone or perform somewhere? NO ONE has the right to tell me what I can do with my business.

Now,  If you choose not to support them or patronize them any longer, that’s your choice and it’s okay. But to take to social media like a “Internet Thug” or a raging animal and say some of the most heartless, foul, mean and harmful things is downright horrific.  I didn’t know that folks were so mean. Down right MEAN. Here’s what I know for sure. You are either contributing to solving this nation’s problem or you are contributing to making it worst. Hate and vicious attacks on anyone is an attack on us all. Because at our deepest level we are all connected whether we choose to believe it or not. You are due your opinion about something. I get that. Because I will speak mine as well. But you don’t have the right to attack…viciously attack people and their families and think that your deeds will go unnoticed or without consequences. When I mean consequences, I mean that EVERYTHING that we put out into the Universe brings back to us a match of that which we’ve sown. This is law…spiritual and universal law.

I have friends who support Trump. I’ve even had a couple who think that Trump’s Presidency is a blessing. While I don’t agree with them, I will never attack them for their choices. Let people be who they are and if it’s not in your best interest to be around them…cut them loose.  Come on folks, our children are watching us. They hear us. They see us. They mimic us. Yes, I have my opinion and I so freely speak it when I think it’s necessary. But to attack and demean a our fellow citizens because you don’t agree with the choices they have made…my question to you becomes, “What in you makes you to think that you have that right?”

Tomorrow will be a difficult day for me as I watch the Obamas leave. I’ve grown to love our First Family and appreciate the dignity, grace and integrity they have displayed in spite of the hatred and ridiculed they received during their 8 year term. I will forever cherish the legacy this man has left. Whether you agree with his policies, you cannot say that he didn’t lead with dignity, intelligence, grace…and a whole lot of swag…I might add.

As I think of Trump as my President, my stomach continues to hurt. He’s not shown me that he has the capacity to lead this country. In some ways, I believe he knows he is in over his head. At least those close to him realize it. I will, however, pray for him and his family. I will continue to pray for the healing of this nation. That I can do with integrity and heart. I will also look for ways to be a better citizen, to use my voice for true change/transformation, use my gifts and talents to make this country better. I will stand for justice, truth, integrity, love, kindness to all. 

I am not worried about being politically correct.  I am merely concerned about being honest, purposeful, kind and loving. Tomorrow will be new day for us in this country with a new leader. We will have a new President of the United States of America and his name is Donald Trump. Now, I’ve got to find a way in my heart to reconcile this fact, so that I can move forward to the things that matters most and continue the work that I’ve been called to do. We have a new President.  May God bless you and bless The United States of America.

How I Responded to The Ferguson’s Conflict

AEB89D15E4CB4499AD50194C6255296E.ashxI’ve been receiving several emails and messages asking what’s my take on the situation in Ferguson. My take on that situation and all of the injustices, chaos and conflicts is the same…that at it’s deepest level, we are looking at a society that has forgotten how to love. And while the issues are deep and internal, we keep trying to fix them externally. You will never solve internal problems with external solutions. At least not permanently. We can get angry, we can blame and we can shout. But the truth is…when we finish shouting, cussing, fussing and making noise, we still have these problems. Humanity needs an overhaul. We have become a society who are seeking quick fixes, magic solutions and we are not willing to look within ourselves for the solutions.

You start solving the world’s problems by starting to love yourself on a personal level. It’s not only an important idea to consider, but it’s urgent! For the world’s good that we start loving ourselves and start seeing our own worth. It’s the only way were are going to have healthy happy relationships. It’s the only way we are going to be a creative contributor to the world. It’s the only way we are going to heal the family breakdown. It’s the only way were are going to stop the violence, it’s the only way we are going to stop injustice even things like poverty, racism, prejudices, and global economic meltdown. When we start loving ourselves, we stop hurting ourselves AND each other.

And that’s what true balance is ultimately about…loving ourselves is the answer. It’s about bringing healing to ourselves individually and to our fellow sisters and brothers. We can’t continue on this tragic journey..it’s a downward spiral. We can’t continue to self reject, self injure and not suffer collectively.

So this is a call on us, an invitation to see how important it is that you self love and how important it is for the greater good. You do yourself and no one else any good by being so self rejecting. Yet, recognizing that it’s not your fault that you feel that way. It’s not your failure, it’s your injury.

This kind of thinking requires that we shift away from the false images that we acquired along the way. And to reverse this, you must change the way you see yourself. We need to recover our true selves, strip away that confusion and that illusion and those lies and come into deep appreciation for the glory, the wonder, the magnificence of who we are and know that it’s not based on what we do…but by virtue of who we are…who we be.

At the root of every world’s problem is low self esteem. At the root of every crisis, at everything going wrong, every bit of poverty, even a lot of sickness…at the root of that is the fundamental idea or belief that “I don’t matter, I don’t count, I’m not worthy.” This is an injury that you encountered along the way by someone who no doubt was injured too.

This is about healing, not blaming. Recovering self, not looking for the perpetrator but recognizing that collectively we are all suffering and for each of us…the first act is one of incredible self love and compassion. To say no more, I matter, I count, I am worth something. I’m need to be whole. The world needs me to love me, to be balanced, to self value. Because without that I’m no good to anybody.

The answer to every single issue in our lives is love. Where there is conflict…that’s where we’ve forgotten to love. Now you have it. This is my take on the situation. I will never allow anything or anyone to remove me from WHO I was born to be. I encourage you to do the same…then we will see this world shift.

The Power of a Collective Voice

This is a picture of my granddaughter, Aubrie. Aubrie does competitive cheerleading. I must admit that she is really great and she competes in a bigger age group because of her advanced skills. She even has a fan base. Sometimes when we are out in restaurants, people come up to her because they know who she is.

While Aubrie does have natural skills and talents, we must give her coach the credit for being able to develop her skills to the level of a champion. One of the other things that I notice in the sport of competitive cheerleading is their ability to work together as a unit. There’s a lot of lifting and flipping bodies up in the air. It takes courage and trust for these young people to allow someone to flip them in the air and catch them without dropping them.

They develop this trust along with the skills by spending an enormous amount of time time together, training, working and playing together. That’s what makes a championship team. Aubrie’s coach, who is her mom and my daughter, is credited for coaching this team to  national championships.

There’s a level of commitment that is required from a championship team that is not required of others. They must train several times a week and  cannot miss scheduled trainings and competitions. The schedule can be tough, especially for a seven year old. But she does it without complaint.

I often wonder what would happen if we would adapt the same strategies, skills and commitment in our life,  that Aubrie’s team does? Could we experience a successful championship life? How committed are you to working with others to build trust and unity towards a common goal of creating a better world? Do you have a coach to help you get to that next level? What if…I’m just saying…..

Remember, Live Authentically, Laugh Everyday and Embrace Love as a Lifestyle.

I’m Pregnant with Vision!

Often times I find myself unable to sleep and feeling kind of restless because I can sense something stirring deep within me. It is during those times that I get really quiet and still, so that I can begin to sense, feel and hear what is trying to emerge through me from my deeper parts.

It’s in those moments that I recognize I am pregnant with a vision and I am ready to give birth.  Sometimes I can birth that vision while staying up all night, praying, meditating and writing until clarity comes and the vision appears on paper. Then there are times when I need to solicit the help of my mentor/coach to serve as my midwife and help me give birth to the vision. Whatever it takes to bring forth the vision, I remain open to it.

What I know for sure is that all of us are pregnant and filled with vision. Many of us are aware and many of us are not. For almost 23 years I worked with youth through my performing arts center and served as a youth pastor for many years. I learned so much from the children and teenagers that I served, but one thing remained constant, the kids who were having trouble in school and with disciplinary issues were the kids who didn’t know how to dream or allow vision to come forth through them.

Through many of my result driven programs, I was able to tap into those kids and help them discover within them powerful dreams and vision. As a result, they began to excel in other areas of their lives so much until, school administrators, community leaders and even judges were calling upon me to come and work with their kids.

What I learned from those experiences  was the truth of Proverbs 29:18, “where there is no vision, the people perish.”   This doesn’t necessarily mean to physically perish, but we can perish emotionally and spiritually. As a result, we have men, women and children walking around emotionally dead because they have no vision.

How many of you are filled with vision and dreams, yet you feel that you are overdue?  You have carried this vision with you like a pregnant woman ready to give birth. But you feel stuck and unable to give birth to it.

When a woman is pregnant with a baby, she must give birth when she is at full term, because without this shift of birthing, her baby will die. And so it is with you. You must give birth to your vision.

I want to share with you 3 steps you can take to give birth to your vision.

  1. Be Still:  Many of us are addicted to being busy. We have filled our days with so many things that it is almost impossible to find time for stillness. But in order to become sensitive to God’s Voice and to sense what is trying to emerge through you, it will require times of stillness on your part. I would recommend you carving out at least thirty minutes first thing in the morning and thirty minutes right before you retire for bed. Making this a part of your daily routine will open a space for you to get clear about your vision.
  2. Recognize and Release Fear:  Fear has been the number one reason why  many women remain stuck. We respond to things that have not happened and need not ever happen. To succeed beyond our fears, we must be one hundred percent prepared to release fear and reach for success.
  3. Trust  God.  All that is left to do is trust. Have faith in a God that is greater than you.  The God that causes the sun to rise, that perfectly heals a wound, takes a seed and turns it into an oak tree is the same God that has planted a vision within you.  Acknowledging God helps bring clarity to what  your vision truly can be.

It’s time that we all rise up and give birth to better world for ourselves and future generation. We don’t have another ten years to think about it, we don’t have time to just sit in front of the television to be entertained by the “housewives.”  We’ve got some birthing to do. We’ve got to help midwife a better tomorrow.

Stop waiting on tomorrow or next year, the baby is ready, so go on and push.

Share your thoughts on this blog. Let us hear what you think.