There was as time in my life when I was so desperate that I made a lot of foolish mistakes. You’ve heard the phrase, “desperate people do desperate things.” Often times, people find themselves in desperate situations for many reasons. But for women, we tend to have a reoccurring cycle of desperation when it comes to our relationships and our money. If you talk to any woman for any length of time, you will soon discover that her story is filled with struggles and pain around her relationships and her money.
For me, I stayed on that up and down roller coaster when it came to my relationships and money. My first marriage was a constant source of pain, struggle, discord and frustration. Things would go well for a few days and then we’d get back to the arguing and discord. It just seemed like we were two people speaking two different languages. We simply couldn’t make our love work. That marriage ended after 16 years of struggle and pain. And even when I started dating a few years after my divorce, it too was another painful experience after another. I became desperate in my relationships. Allowing things that were totally unacceptable in the relationships and doing things that were totally out of character for me. I was desperate. I wanted so much NOT to fail again in my relationship and that’s exactly what happened anyway. I began to recognize that I was the common denominator of my relationship pain.
As in the case of my finances. I would make money in my business and at the end of the month, I would still be broke. Bills late or unpaid and me broke. “What in the world was going on?”, I would think to myself. How could a person earn good money and still not have any? So of course, I believed that I needed to earn more money. Therefore, in my desperation to earn more money, I would throw myself into my business, grinding and trying to make more money. Spending little time with my children and still never having enough money. Again, I recognized that I was at the center of all of this.
Of course, I thought all of this was a personal failure on my part. Or surely it was the men in my life who were worthless and it was perhaps my clients who wouldn’t pay me on time…on and on…I would blame others. But the real deal was, I couldn’t keep a man and I couldn’t keep any money. I was lonely, I was broke and I was desperate. But this time in my space of desperation… someone said to me “for things to get better, you’ve got to get better. For things to change, you’ve got to change.” I finally heard TRUTH and it was then that I was willing to do anything..whatever it took, I was going to change my life. And that’s when my first mentor/coach walked into my life. When the student is ready, the teacher will appear. My coach was able to help me see my blind spots. It was NOT what I was doing that was keeping me on this roller coaster ride and causing my struggles and pain, It was WHO I was BEING.
Learning new ways of being and showing up in life as my true authentic self were the keys to my transformation. My coach taught me how to identify the core issues I had around love and money and how to breakthrough…I broke through. I’m now married to a wonderful husband of almost 11 years and my business is growing and upscaling every single year. I know my triggers and I know how to effectively deal with them. Life is not perfect…but it sure is a hell of a lot sweeter when you know who you are and how to align your action with who you really are. Everyday, I get to help women transform their lives through my proven, turn key system…The Love Lifestyle Coaching System.
The first step in me moving my life from a space of desperation to a life of joy and abundance, was to tell the truth to myself about myself. In that new space, there was no judgement, just awareness and awareness gives us the ability to make new choices. What new choices will you make for your life today? Earning more money or finding a new love in your life will not guarantee that you won’t fail again. Identifying WHY you are struggling and learning how to breakthrough is what will offer you the new life you so desire and deserve. You deserve to live your dreams. Nothing new will happen, if you don’t take the steps to become someone new…the person you were meant to me. She’s inside of you already…waiting to emerge. You simply need a midwife to help you give birth to her. I’m willing to be that midwife if you let me.
I will leave you with this question. “When will you take the next step to ensure that your tomorrows will be different?”
Remember, live authentically, laugh everyday and embrace love as a lifestyle. Because success in life really does begin with love.