I call February “Heart” month. That’s because we celebrate “heart health” in February and we also celebrate Valentine’s Day in this month, as well. I truly believe that it’s every woman’s dream and desire to be loved and cherished by her beloved the right way. I also believe women know exactly what they want from a relationships. However, we allow our layers of unexpressed pain, societal programming and the opinions of others to prevent us from fully articulating our truth about love.
I hear women say things like, “I’m not going to settle.” Or they will say, “I’m just not putting up with any mess.” And while I agree that no one should have to settle or put up with any mess, we do need to be fully clear about what we want from a relationship. But here’s the point that women miss when they express their feelings about relationships. They know what they want from their beloved, yet, they are not as sure or accurate about what they are giving in return to the relationship. How do I know this?
For one thing, I see it all the time. I hear women talk about what their husbands or man is not doing for them, how he is treating them and what they are not getting in the relationship. Yet, I also hear what they are not saying out of their mouths too. They share the ways in which they give to their mates the best parts of themselves and how their mates don’t give anything back in return. There’s a spiritual law that says, “Only what YOU are NOT giving in any situation is MISSING.” While facts can be challenged, spiritual laws are irrefutable.
Therefore, if you are not getting what you want in your relationship, it’s stands to reason that you are not giving it. And is it really fair to ask someone to do for you what you are not willing to give in the first place? Now before you get all upset and accuse me of not being fair, I want you to know that I too use to feel the same way.
After my divorce, I was financially broke with bad credit from my marriage, yet, I wanted a man who was financially fit, had money with good credit. It wasn’t until I cleaned up my credit score and started earning some great money and paid off my debts, that I finally met a man who was financially fit and savvy. Another thing that I wanted in my relationship was someone who would spend quality time with me and would not put anything or anyone else a priority over me because I was always felt invisible to my ex-husband. It wasn’t until I slowed down and started spending quality time with myself that I met someone who was willing to put me first and spend quality time with me. I learned that only what I was willing to give in a relationship is what I would receive it back.
I hear women who say they don’t want a man who cheats and lie to them. But on the other hand, these same women lie to themselves all the time. They lie about how they are going to lose weight and then cheat by eating bad food and don’t exercise. They lie about how they are going save money, spend more time with their kids, and they lie on their income taxes. Yet, when they continue to attract into their lives men who lie and cheat, they are upset. While these women are faithful and don’t cheat in their love relationships, they do lie to themselves, their kids, and cheat the IRS. Because how we do one thing is how we do everything. So when a cheater shows up in their lives, they gave attracted him there.
I know this may sound crazy to you and I may have just ruffled your feathers. I get it. I do it all the time…but it’s all because I love you and I want you to win. Plus, it’s important that you understand how spiritual and universal laws work. They are operating all the time in your life whether you believe in them or not. I would never suggest that anyone remains with someone who physically and emotionally abuses them. Because abuse is never okay from anyone.
Yet, I do believe in the magic of love. I love to be in love. I am so much softer, better and happier when I am in love. Love is a catalyst for me…it’s an energizer, it’s juice for my soul. I love how it makes me feel gentle and warm, giddy and playful, excited and adventurous. This is why I work so hard at making love work in my marriage. I blossom when I am in love and being loved and cherished the right way. It brings out my feminine powerful side. But I had to confess that I didn’t know how to make love work. I couldn’t see my blind spots. I didn’t know what I didn’t know. I had to learn how to Awaken My Heart Space to Love.
These are the 4 things I did to start opening my heart space to the love that I’ve found:
- I admitted the truth: I admitted that I knew very little about how to make love work. I recognized that the defenses I carried within were pushing love away from me. So, I began working with a coach to help me to open my heart space. In these sessions, I learned that my heart space was blocked from some unhealed and unexpressed father-daughter pain. I went through some healing modalities that helped me to release my invisible hidden pain. We must express our unhealed pain in order to open our heart space.
- I wrote down all of the things I wanted from a relationship. Once I wrote those things down, I then asked myself, “Angela, are you willing to do and be all of these things?” Then I began working on making sure I was becoming the very person I was seeking to love. Studies show us that whatever we write in our own handwriting that 70% of it will come true. So write it down ladies.
- I wrote a letter to my divine right mate. I wrote a letter to the man that would enter my life. I said all of the things that I wanted to say to him, I sealed that letter and dated it. When I finally met Bill, my husband, and we began to date, I knew he was that man in my letter. I remember opening the letter and reading it to him and as I read it to him, I also realized that I had become much of what was in that letter. Letter writing is a powerful tool. It allows us to see and hear what’s really inside of us.
- I learned my greatest lesson about love. Only what I was willing to give was what I would receive. I had to first give it to myself. I had to first learn how to love myself completely and authentically. My love story did begin with me.
What about you? Do you love to love? Is love something you crave or is it something you’ve simply given up on? Dr. Hendricks once said, “It takes two people to destroy a relationship, but it only takes one to transform it?” Do you want to transform your relationship? Are you ready to attract true love into your life? Here’s the real question, “Are you ready to Awaken your heart space for love?” If you answered yes to any of these questions, I want to invite you to become a part of my new “Love Rekindled” group coaching program. I am going to help you transform your love life in the next 90 days. Whether you are married, divorced, single or in what we call “it’s complicated”, this program is for you. Take a look and join today. www.ourloveredefined.com
Please leave a comment below. We want to hear what you have to say about this article. And if you really liked this article, share it on your Facebook page. Thank you.