When I started this journey of helping women who grew up with an unattached, unavailable or absent father, I had no idea how big the need would be. Before facing my own father-daughter issues, I simply didn’t believe I had any. I would always say, “I didn’t miss what I didn’t have.” Little did I know that I was carrying a lot of pain as a result of not having my father’s provision, protection, presence and praise. The 4 essentials every girl needs from her dad.
You see, I was a model student in school. I made good grades, my mom had me in extra curriculum actives such as modeling, piano, voice and dance. I was in social clubs, on the church choir, was a debutante and never got in any trouble. So of course all of my teachers, mentors, neighbors, my mom and grandmother all thought I was okay. But what they didn’t know was the deep “ACHE” I carried inside of me every single day. So, just because your daughter is excelling, doesn’t mean that she’s not feeling the ache on the inside. I never really knew what this ache was…I simply knew that I didn’t believe I was pretty, I didn’t think I was lovable, I didn’t think people would like me, all which made me appear distant, stand off and unapproachable. Many girls thought this was me being uppity or thinking I was better than them. Far from the truth. I was living a constant internal dialogue that said, “you are not good enough, you’re invisible and do not exist in your daddy’s eyes.” These feelings flooded my soul and NO ONE knew.
Fast forward to being married with three children. Broken trying to make love work and be a good mother all while carrying these internal beliefs. Disaster is what was created. When that married of 16 years ended…I was alone, broke and broken. I didn’t have a plan B. When I finally uncovered the root of my ache, I knew that I had to heal. A girl’s identity if tied to her father-daughter relationship. I lived my life all this time with no real sense of identity. Our pain will never heal until we heal our mis-placed sense of identity. I had to retrace my life beyond my mother’s womb. I started the journey. There began my Journey to Being. This process was a painful one indeed…I must admit. But it was one that I had to go through.
The seven foundational principles of The Journey to Being Process™ healed and radically transformed my life and is now doing the same for countless women, girls and fathers around the world. It amazes me each time I receive a phone call, an email, a gift or a text from someone who has been effected by this work. I’ve seen marriages put back together. I’ve seen father-daughter relationships healed. I’ve witnessed the power of forgiveness breakthrough barriers, beliefs and blocks that have prevented many dreams from being actualized.
Now as we travel around the country showing the documentary, The Making of a Fatherless Daughter, I can only believe that we will see more women and men become free. Who knew this could happen? I believe that my life’s purpose was encoded within my life’s story. On my travels, I get to hear stories from others who have shared the common pain and bonds of fatherlessness. I also witness many of the fathers’ pain who simply didn’t know how to show up for their daughters and the many unfortunate journeys they’ve too have traveled. What I know for sure is that I’ve been given a gift with this work. I also know that when daddy leaves, something dies. But through this work, we can bring back life into the hearts of men and their daughters where possible. We can clearly redefine our lives beyond our fatherlessness. We can reclaim our true value and worth and finally…we can rewrite the tragic story of fatherlessness throughout the land. We can help women transform their relationship with love and money, build dreams and birth visions and live the Awakened Life.
Yet, it’s not possible for me to do it alone. I need help. Those women who will hear this will answer with a maternal care to help protect that which we love…we love our greatest resource…our women/girls. This is a call for those of you who work with women and girls to join our movement. Our mission is to ignite a generation of Fatherless Daughter Advocates who will facilitate workshops/programs/events that will totally transform the lives of the women and girls within their communities. We will provide training and ongoing support to help you lead “The Journey to Being Process™” in a workshop format or as an ongoing program that will go beyond skill teaching to becoming a life transformative experience for both the women and girls you serve.
Our Online Virtual Certification Training Program will show you how to take your work to the next level as an experienced, trusted authority, by learning proven techniques for bringing women and girls together regardless of differences in age, ethnicity or economic background, and deliver deep, result driven personal growth and development content.
Let’s have a conversation about how you can join this movement of transformation and change. When women and girls heal, so does a nation heal. Schedule your conversation with me: www.yesiamready.info